


Shadows and Secrets

by WildastheRiver



Series: Carving Stars in Stone [2]
Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies)
Genre: F/M, Foreshadowing, brotherly concern, cute moments, dwarf/elf problems, post DOS, post sexy times, things are going to get worse before they get better
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-18
Updated: 2014-01-18
Packaged: 2018-01-09 03:32:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,482
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1140922
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WildastheRiver/pseuds/WildastheRiver
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kili wants to believe he can have the best of both worlds with Tauriel, but his reality may be very different.  And it's not an easy reality to face, especially when his brother confronts him over it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Shadows and Secrets

**Author's Note:**

> Hello again! As I thought/hoped, this has evolved into a bit of a series. How long remains to be seen, but for note, there will be at least two more after this one. This one's a bit less happy/hopeful than the last one, but it kind of sets up where I want this go without being too much of a fairytale...
> 
> Once again, my knowledge of the LOTR universe is limited to the movies, so any mistakes made are mine due to my lack of knowledge/insufficient research. So, any mistakes universe wise are likely accident. Character representations are likely head canon.

“You should go,” she whispered, touching his chin.  “You will be missed.”  Kili knew he was already missed, Fili would have noticed by now he was missing.  Still, his brother was not nearly so comforting a sight as the red headed elf at his side.  Even if she was looking at him within something that resembled resignation.  He smiled, kissing her fondly.

“And you worry to much, lady elf.  We have time to, ah, have another go—“  He made to take her again in his arms, but she placed a hand on his chest and halted his movement.  Her gaze was serious.

“Kili.  Please.”  Her fingers trailed down his collar bone to rest above his heart.  “I do not wish to put this at risk.”  Her voice carried warning, a worried one.  They both knew the suspicions they aroused, and she would not ignore them while he would.  But he could not defy her wishes any more than he could deny the sun rose and fell every day.  Joining their hands briefly, he heaved a sigh and sat, throwing his legs over the side of her bed.  It was a short jump to the floor, and he winced a little as his feet touched the ground; the stone was cold, but more than that, his leg that had taken the Morgol shaft still gave him pain.  Tauriel straightened, her concern sharp.  

“‘M fine,” he said, waving her off as he felt for his trousers.  The pain faded to the ache he barely noticed now, and he gathered his clothing with the majority of his old speed.  She watched him as he dressed, and Kili made sure to put on a bit of a show.

Alright, maybe a lot of a show.  She chuckled as he toppled onto his good side, cursing in Dwarvish.  “Perhaps you would have better luck if you focused on what you need to do, and not how to impress me.”  He got to his feet again as she stood, slipping into her under-tunic.  For those seconds where she crossed the path of the moon, he stopped and stared.  Her hair, red as embers in any other light, was the most beautiful of silver in the moonlight, and her skin gleamed white.  It was like she was spun from the stars she so very loved.  But no star was as beautiful as her.  She came to him, lacing his tunic up with her usual firm expression.  It was always a pleasure to see her fingers work, either dressing or undressing him, her touch barely there but always certain.  He must have been staring, for she raised a brow, her expression somewhat bemused.  

“Has your fall stunned you a little?” she asked, smoothing his front.  He grabbed her hands and kissed her delicately (or as delicately as one can with a good set of whiskers), attempting to appease her.  It must have worked, for he felt her smile.  “Only a little then.”  He scoffed in mock anger.

“You underestimate me too much.”

“I learned not to do that early on, Kili, when you thought letting your kin through the gate was a good idea.”  Tauriel straightened, her hands sliding to his shoulders.  “Now, you really must go.”  She had come to him in direct defiance to her king, stayed with him when the dragon threatened to burn them to the ground, and continued staying through his recovery.  But the idea that someone could discover just what they were doing made her more on edge than any threat to life did.  It was rather enduring.

“Give us a kiss, and I’ll be on my way,” he said, grinning, all mischief and teasing.  She was so different from the other elves, especially now, and for all her power and predatory edge, she went soft for him.  Not that he was complaining, it was nice to be with someone who appreciated him as more than just royalty or a dream.  No, here she was the dream.

And at the moment, she was rolling her eyes, shaking her head, and giving him a quick kiss.  Then he was being steered to the door; she was remarkably strong for her build, but then, most elves must have been like that.  Just short of her actually tossing him out, he turned around, grabbing her hands again.  “You’ll be there at breakfast?”

Tauriel paused, a flicker of unease in her eyes even as she tried to smile.  “I will do my best.”  It gave Kili a moment of hesitation, but she had opened the door again, brushing her thumb along his chin.  “Goodnight, Kili.”  She looked like she was going to say more, but she didn’t, and he didn’t press her.  Instead, with one last look over his shoulder, he left, hearing the door shut behind him.  There was something going on, it seemed.  What it could have been, he had no idea, and he wasn’t sure he wanted to know.  Blowing out a long puff of air, he ran a hand through his hair and made to return to his own quarters.  Everyone would be asleep now, and if he was quiet enough, they’d stay—

There was a clearing of a throat to his right, and he jumped, fists at the ready, only to see his brother step from the shadows, expression rather stormy.

“Ah! Ah… hah, how… how long have you been there?” he asked, trying to keep his tone light.  If Fili’s darkening expression was anything to go by, it did nothing to uplift the mood.

“Long enough.”  Kili didn’t want to know what that meant, and his smile disappeared.  Fili wasn’t done either.  “You’re bedding her?  Tauriel?”

“What’s it matter if I am?”

“What’s it—!”  Fili huffed through his moustaches, barely restraining his anger.  Kili recognized that look, he’d seen it enough when they were younger.  “She’s an _elf_ , for starters, she’s captain of the Mirkwood guard—“

“Not anymore—“

“What’s it matter!  She’s not someone you can pledge yourself to, Kili, nor should you be bedding her just on the fact of what it could mean for us!  What do you think Thorin will do if he finds out?”

Kili swallowed, licking his lips.  “He won’t—“

“But what if he DOES?  Have you thought of the consequences?  For you, for her?”  No, he arguably hadn’t.  Thorin was so occupied with the mountain Kili was pretty sure he could have kissed Tauriel over the breakfast table and he wouldn’t have noticed.  Not that he wanted to try.  But if Thorin DID find out…  the results would probably be more messy than Smaug’s fall.  He’d already seen Oin’s annoyed concern, and had little doubt Balin and Bofer suspected something, but they’d been so careful—

“I can’t just leave her,” he said finally, looking at his brother with wide eyes, “We—we’re so much more than where we started, Fili, she… she makes life so much brighter.”

“Brighter.”

“Yes, brighter.”  It sounded better in his head.  But, he couldn’t think of a better way to describe it.

Fili heaved a sigh, rubbing his brow.  “Oh Mahal, you love her.  Kili…”  He shook his head, giving his younger brother a rather bleak look.  “You are on your own with her.  I can’t defend you if Thorin finds out.”

Kili didn’t move, confusion and… something that felt like betrayal making his blood run cold.  “Fili—“

“You are my brother, and I will do almost anything for you, but I cannot save you from this.  Whatever comes of this, it’s on you.  This is your choice.”

“You sound like I’m doing this on purpose!”

“Well you are, aren’t you?”  Kili opened his mouth to retort, but found he couldn’t.  He was, they were.  Careful as they were, none of it was an accident or a mistake.  There was no fever or Morgol shaft to taint whatever purpose there was to their actions.  Fili must have noticed the change in his expression, because he touched his shoulder carefully.  Kili looked up, meeting his brother’s gaze, wanting an answer, some sort of reassurance.  Fili had always given it before.  But this time, there was only a sadness he hadn’t seen before.

“Wherever she takes you, brother, make sure you know where the path will go, or that you’re at least willing to follow,” Fili said, his voice solemn.  Something in it unnerved Kili, and a tiny sliver of doubt wormed into his heart; was he doing this all for a far more bitter end than death?

“… I will,” he said finally.  Fili gave him one last studying look, then turned and left, disappearing down the staircase from where he’d come from.  Kili didn’t move, looking back over his shoulder at the door he’d come from less than ten minutes before.  It seemed some cavern had opened in that time, and he wasn’t sure how easy it would be to cross it.


End file.
